Dignity / Guilt Culture
"I won't hide from you that my sister and I are much aggrieved at the intolerance and discord among us. We beg you to remember that peace and brotherhood should reign here."
— Babette's Feast (1987)
In Part 1 I introduced this series and summarized Honor / Shame Culture, which is in contrast to Dignity / Guilt culture and usually considered the older of the two.
Now, I've seen Dignity Culture labeled as the more modern, more individualistic alternative to Honor Culture with a stronger internal locus of control (no one can take your dignity, supposedly), but again — that is oversimplifying. For one thing, it isn't necessarily newer than Honor Culture in the United States — the Dignity approach was strong in the early Puritans and Quakers, once again as described in David Hackett Fischer's Albion's Seed.
(Which is an interesting book on its own and neatly aligns with Political Compass Memes — Cavaliers would be Authoritarian Right, Borderers / Scots-Irish would be Libertarian Right, Quakers would be Libertarian Left, and Puritans would be Authoritarian Left.)
If Honor Culture is about being an unstoppable force, Dignity Culture is about being an immovable object. Think of the English "stiff upper lip" and "Keep Calm and Carry On" aesthetic. In most cases, dignity is not something that can be taken away by external forces or wrested away in a challenge. You hold onto dignity with diamond hands. Ignoring bullies, dismissing insults rather than retaliating, and refusing to get drawn into conflict is not a sign of a weakness, but a power move. You win by not bothering to play the game. Above all, you do not make a scene, because that would be embarrassing. Being quiet and calm is not just a strategy, but a whole way of life. Think Ian's quiet, hands-off WASP parents in My Big Fat Greek Wedding, in contrast to Toula's large, involved, boisterous extended family.
Dignity has an aspect of self-control, but since we all have mortal vulnerabilities, it also requires a functioning society outside of yourself to consistently maintain. You are said to lose your dignity when you have your privacy taken away, or when you're having medical issues (such as throwing up from the stomach bug, or needing help with basic hygiene, or being in uncontrollable pain), or being in dire poverty so you lack access to food or shelter or sanitation. The Puritans of New England had the concept of "freedom from want," so society would step in and make sure people had their basic needs met. (Some concepts that are believed to have started with Marxism are actually much older than that. Puritans were way more leftist than most people think, and some of the things they did to price-gouging business owners would make a modern tankie blush.)
Morally, there is a straightforward sense that your actions are right or wrong — there's not so much these extra categories of wrong-but-cool or okay-if-you-can-pull-it-off. Doing a bad thing is still doing a bad thing even if you can get away with it, and even if it doesn’t directly affect other people in the community. In old Puritan-influenced subcultures, if wasting money on luxuries and alcohol can ruin the lives of poor people who can't afford it, then it's wrong and wasteful, period — rich or poor, everybody ought to live simply and soberly. Going back to Fischer's Albion's Seed again — in the Cavalier subculture, poor indentured single women who got pregnant were punished for lower economic productivity and inconveniencing the aristocrat. In cultures where “shotgun weddings” were common and not particularly stigmatized, premarital sex was tolerated as long as it wasn’t publicly flaunted and didn’t end up in a baby born out of wedlock. Meanwhile, in the Puritan subculture, premarital sex was considered inherently morally wrong no matter one's gender or social class, or the outcome on the community.
The upside of Dignity / Guilt culture is that failure and weakness are not automatically stigmatized — guilt is reserved, in theory, for when people individually and consciously choose to commit a moral wrong. The moral rules are also — at least in theory — consistent, fair, and equitable. The guilt of sin can be confessed, washed away, atoned for, and redeemed from — not rubbed in your face forever like shame. (Although if your community is heavy on both guilt and public shaming like in Nathaniel Hawthorne's The Scarlet Letter, then you're kind of screwed). And if it's unclear if one actually did anything wrong, apologizing anyway to keep the peace is not beyond the pale. It's a running joke that Canadians are known for saying "sorry" as a filler word.
People from a well-functioning Dignity Culture will have a healthy sense of stubbornness, balancing the need for compassion with their own good judgment, confident in their own perceptions without undue pride. They know that prudence and self-preservation aren't particularly cool, but are willing to turn down unnecessary risks. They won't humiliate people perceived as weak or vulnerable, and — within prudent personal boundaries — readily admit their own share of weaknesses or vulnerability without insecurity.
At the same time, they won't fall for just any old con artist who claims to be wronged, and they won't automatically believe any accusation of wrongdoing without reason and evidence and due process. Fairness and rule of law are important. Tolerance is important — in a pluralistic society, a mature and responsible adult is someone who can recognize that other people have different beliefs and opinions and not feel threatened by that.
In an Honor Culture article series on The Art of Manliness, Brett McKay argues that traditional honor cultures in the USA lost their influence as society became more modernized, atomized, and diverse — people from one Honor Culture group would recognize that people acting differently were not necessarily cowardly or shameless, but rather living by the code of another Honor Culture group. Further, more centralization and organization meant that individual and minority rights were protected, and one didn't have to belong to any Honor Culture group at all. If ostracized and shamed out of one Honor Culture group, the outcast could just join another group — or strike out on their own and be their nonconforming self.
Liberal Dignity Culture done well — with its emphasis on personal privacy, the inherent worth of the individual, and formal legal protections given to everybody including the marginalized and the unpopular — means that people don't need to be financially dependent on pleasing the collective, and don't have to perform other people's values to survive. In early American history, while the Quakers were strict and moralistic and conformed with each other, they didn't expect non-Quakers to conform to them. They were also pacifistic, abolished slavery in their colonies, and — at least by the standards of their time — supported the rights of minority religions other than their own.
The Quakers also promoted solitary prison with the idea that it was a humane alternative to other forms of punishment from back then. The idea was to avoid physical harm to the prisoners and improve their character with godly solitude and spiritual growth. But the isolation itself took a mental health toll. In a similar way, in the 21st Century United States during the coronavirus pandemic, policy makers appear to have downplayed the negative effects of social isolation from lockdowns and school closures.
Another downside of Dignity / Guilt culture, compared to Honor / Shame culture, is that the strong emphasis on guilt can lead to neuroticism — and in an unhealthy Dignity Culture, people's own consciences can be weaponized against them by people claiming to be weak or offended. (So, part of "Victimhood Culture" is actually just exploiting existing loopholes in Dignity Culture.) Often, ignoring bullies doesn't work. Sweeping problems under the rug, in general, is a bad idea. The Dignity / Guilt dynamic can also enable passive-aggressive behavior where the offender maintains a calm and rational façade while deliberately needling their victim until the victim snaps and makes a scene... and the person who makes a scene is unfairly assumed to be the bad guy. The "smug liberal" and the "fedora atheist" and the "passive-aggressively racist progressive" are political stereotypes that exist for a reason.
Dignity Culture liberals are bemused by Honor Culture conservatives' tendency to make a scene, especially when it comes to "cancel culture" or other culture war issues. Making a big show of dropping up to hundreds of dollars on buying Dr. Seuss books because a handful of the lesser-known ones with problematic images were taken out of print, is an Honor Culture strategy of pushing back and demonstrating that they notice cultural institutions taking the first inch, and will definitely notice if there is serious censorship attempted down the road. From a Dignity Culture viewpoint, it is pointlessly silly. "Why make a scene? Is this the hill you're doing to die on? When there are real problems going on in the world? It's a private company and no big deal. How embarrassing. LOL, stop it, you're making a scene!"
But at a certain point, denizens of Dignity Culture can snap and make a scene themselves. With its strong sense of morality and respectability, there has to be a social contract where you get to have a decent life if you, as former President Bill Clinton put it, "work hard and play by the rules." Be good, study hard, work to improve society rather than engaging in the pursuits of the flesh — a moral life brings expectations of a reward. But if "majoring in humanities at a respectable university" is the new "ruining your life through hard drugs, unprotected sex, binge drinking, and wasteful spending" then that is a recipe for lots of angry, indebted, moralistic college graduates with unmet expectations and just enough middle-class institutional power to lash out and make other people miserable.
Some commentators demonize (or romanticize!) Honor Culture for carrying out punishments or consequences in public, old-school, rather than privately without embarrassment. Old forms of public shaming can be cruel and intense. But a public callout from a coach or drill sergeant or other authority figure done right (i.e. briefly, undramatically, not making it personal) is not so bad, just enough to catch your attention and correct yourself. Also, the presence of your peers — while embarrassing — is also a form of accountability for the leader in the form of witnesses.
In turn, people underestimate how, in its emphasis on personal thoughts and private one-on-one interactions, Dignity Culture gone wrong can be surprisingly intense as well, and insanely abusive. The person in power can summon you privately behind closed doors, berate your whole inner character and sense of self-worth, say or do things they wouldn't do publicly, and you have no peer witnesses to support you or hold the abuser accountable for being a creepy groomer or a complete fucking drama queen.
Honor and Dignity Together
In the modern-day United States, most people are have influences from both Honor Cultures and Dignity Cultures. Social and geographic mobility means people are exposed to different social classes and regional cultures, respectively. People from different ethnic and racial backgrounds are united through marriage, family, and friendship. And individual personalities may gravitate toward one or the other approach.
Cobra Kai, a Karate Kid sequel series currently on Netflix, exhibits this interplay very well. Johnny Lawrence shows a predominantly Honor Culture mentality in his martial arts training approach: he has a pragmatic view that bullies will exist in spite of the rules, so "losers" should be trained to defend themselves and proactively demonstrate they can't be pushed around. He is all about breaking the rules and doing dangerous things without getting caught. But in his personal life — similar to Dignity Culture — he also turns out to be a big softie and easily manipulated by a bad actor who preys on his conscience, as well as being downwardly mobile after growing up in affluence. Meanwhile, Daniel LaRusso's martial arts approach is all about discipline and dignity and finding serenity and balance. But in his personal life, he shows Honor Culture traits of being close to and protective of his extended family, sensitive to disrespect, financially successful yet in touch with his working class roots, and being easily riled up by Johnny's provocations. The series, particularly in the recently released Season 4, depicts the value of integrating both approaches to martial arts and life in general.
At their best, Honor / Shame and Dignity / Guilt cultures can co-exist and bring out each other's strengths in a free and pluralistic society.
Next Up: Validation Culture and the worst of both worlds